Summary
- Love Is Blind
could benefit from taking more time for couples to get to know each other face-to-face, like on
Big Brother
. - Big Brother
‘s success in creating lasting relationships comes from the participants getting to know each other without distractions or pressure. - Love Is Blind
focuses too much on the concept of being “blind” to physical appearance but overlooks the importance of physical chemistry and getting to know someone beyond just looks.
Love Is Blind is one of many reality dating shows that aim to bring two people together in a beautiful, romantic relationship. They skip straight to the punch, getting engaged, going on vacation, moving in together, and then (hopefully) getting married. While Love Is Blind has yielded several successful marriages, like Lauren and Cameron, Matt and Amber, Alexa and Brendan, and, most recently, Milton and Lydia, the series could learn something from Big Brother. Yes, as strange as it sounds, that reality competition show might have nothing to do with dating but has spawned many successful relationships, even more than shows designed specifically for dating. This includes married couples, some with kids, and relationships that have lasted for years.
The whole concept of fast-tracking a romance that is central to Love Is Blind seems impossible. Sure, we’ve all heard stories from parents and grandparents about how they met and knew on the first date they were soulmates. But there’s something to be said for taking the time to truly get to know one another, not just behind a wall but face-to-face, too.
What Is Love Is Blind and Big Brother About?
Big Brother
- Release Date
- July 5, 2000
- Main Genre
- Family
- Seasons
- 25
- Studio
- CBS
Love Is Blind, one of Netflix’s best dating shows, premiered in 2020 and has aired five complete seasons, with a sixth that began on Valentine’s Day 2024. The premise features a cast of singles meeting with others in pods where they can only talk to one another without seeing the other person. The idea is to build a romantic connection based on personality alone. If two people feel they have connected on a deep level, they can talk more. Eventually, one can propose, at which point they finally meet in person for a big reveal.
From there, they go on vacation together as an engaged couple, head back home to reside in a new shared apartment, meet one another’s families, and start planning a wedding. If all goes well, they make it down the aisle and say, “I do.” In some cases, the relationships fizzle out before reaching that stage. In others, the pair make it to the wedding, but one (or both) decide not to move forward.
By contrast, Big Brother, on the air since 2000 with 25 seasons under its belt and counting, places 16 houseguests into a house where they must live with one another, cut off from the real world. They form bonds, are not typically romantic (though “showmances” do happen), strategize, and compete in physical and mental competitions. Each week, someone is voted out until two people are left—the jury, composed of the last nine evicted houseguests, votes on the winner.
Slow and Steady Wins the Relationship Race With Big Brother
There’s a logical reason for Big Brother’s success in introducing lasting relationships. On Big Brother, players are stuck in a house for an entire summer with nothing to do but interact with one another. They wear mic packs and are filmed 24/7, including both for the structured show episodes as well as the live feeds to which fans can subscribe. The players get to see one another in their rawest forms, without any distractions, nor most importantly, pressure. Because the cameras are on literally all the time, it’s easy for players to forget they’re on television and let down their guards.
So, it’s no surprise that Big Brother romances, called “showmances” during filming, have continued after the show. Every Big Brother marriage has lasted, and while some more casual relationships have not, that’s the point. The couples were able to take the time to get to know one another in the real world before making such a lasting commitment.
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Big Brother power couple Jeff and Jordan, for example, played together on the show twice, where they spent months in the house with others, getting closer with each passing day. They dated for several years before he proposed and have since had two children. Rachel and Brendon played twice as well and became romantically involved with one another within the first week of meeting. They continued dating after the show, married years later, and now have two children together as well. They have been together since 2010.
In total, there are seven marriages between people who met on Big Brother’s 25 seasons, along with several long-running relationships, like Derek and Claire, who have been going strong since they met on season 23 in 2021.
A Race to the Final Line in Love Is Blind
For its first five seasons, Love Is Blind has also seen its share of success, so the experiment isn’t a total bust. This includes a total of 10 marriage proposals, eight of which have lasted and two that ended in divorce. That’s not too shabby, but the track record could have been higher if the show took some hints from Big Brother.
Central to the plan of Love Is Blind is to strip away distractions of real life and eliminate preconceptions of physical appearance. What the show fails to acknowledge, however, is that there is more to seeing someone in person than just learning their race, facial features, and body type. There’s something to be said for mannerisms, facial expressions, and letting down a guard. You need to be comfortable with seeing someone and looking into their eyes: that tells you a lot about someone beyond just what they say and how they act when they don’t have to look at you. It’s not all about vanity but also about physical chemistry.
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It was obvious, for example, that Love Is Blind cast members like Shaina and Irina were not physically attracted to the men they got engaged to, Kyle and Zack, respectively. Meanwhile, in season 5, JP outright told Taylor he did not like that she wore a lot of make-up. This might be important to him (not to mention her) and could have saved them both time if he knew from the get-go that her style, not her looks, didn’t fit with something he felt strongly about.
Putting on Your Best Self
Love Is Blind has shown time and time again that cast members, particularly in the later seasons, can put on masks of their best selves while in the pods. Sal, for example, came across as the sweetest man, singing to Mallory and professing his love. Outside of the pods, however, he appeared to have many more layers to him. Irina was so convincing in her upbeat and sweet personality that she led Zack to go against his better judgment and choose her over Bliss. As it turned out, considering Zack and Bliss are now married with a baby on the way, this was a glaring mistake.
Physical attraction isn’t all that matters, but Big Brother allows houseguests to get to know one another without any pressure while slowly stripping away any feelings that the person isn’t their usual “type.” With Big Brother, players who might not otherwise have looked at one another, like McRae and Amanda, James and Natalie, and in the most recent season, America and Cory, got past the initial “not my type” barrier once they genuinely got to know the person. With Love Is Blind, the shock of seeing someone when they aren’t at all what you expected adds a layer of complexity to the situation. It’s as if you got to know someone you didn’t really know at all.
On Big Brother, as noted, houseguests see the good and the bad. You see everything from how the person eats to what they look like without make-up and all their quirks, both endearing and undesirable. This helps potential partners see beyond an initial lack of attraction or strengthen it. There’s truth to the saying that someone’s looks can “grow on you,” but with Love Is Blind, there’s too much pressure for that to happen. On Big Brother, it’s completely organic.
Big Brother Gets the Dating Game Right
It’s strange to acknowledge that Big Brother, a reality TV show that defined the 2000s, is one of the more successful dating reality shows without actually being a dating show.
If Love Is Blind could learn anything from Big Brother without losing the core theme of the show, it’s to let couples meet in person without getting engaged (but after making a strong connection). They can spend time with one another face-to-face and then decide whether or not to move forward. Sure, this would largely change the structure of the show. But it would still prove (or disprove) that love is blind without resulting in people who might not click the same way when they meet in person to end an engagement before a real relationship has even started.
The one piece of advice a show like Big Brother could impart on Love Is Blind is to recognize that the element of shock and awe of seeing someone for the first time and trying to reconcile them with whom you have “fallen in love” is a lot to process. It’s that part of the equation, not necessarily an initial lack of attraction based on appearance alone, that can be what blinds the experience in the first place. Love Is Blind is available to stream on Netflix, while Big Brother is streaming on Paramount+.
